We've all been there, right? The first day of a new month. The first day of doing x, y, or z every single day. Or, more often, the first day of x, y, AND z.
October wasn't going to be any different for me. I was going to get back on track. There are so many things that I do sporadically - meditate, run, breathing practice, 10K steps - and I have spent the last week making plans on how I was finally going to get all of that together into a daily practice. Finally.
I decided that a key part of that would be to take the mental energy out of my daily yoga practice. No longer would I go to my mat and make things up or turn on the tv and choose a video from Dana and/or Jessamyn. Nope. I created a very energetic, strength, and stretchy practice to do every day in October. I included poses that I enjoy, a few that I want to get better at, and my nemesis. And I was excited.
I got up this morning. I did my breath practice before I even get out of bed. I flossed. I had my green smoothie.
October is going to be the month.
And then it starts to fall apart a little. There is a race downtown. That made the drive to the park a little bit longer for me and my yoga buddy. Make that a lot longer. I finally got to the park after several detours to find that there are people sleeping in the gazebo. I swallowed my irritation to be thankful that I have a home (but I was definitely irritated at first), and found a smooth-ish spot to roll out our mats.
Then I started doing math with my schedule for the day. If she gets here five minutes from now, we'll be able to get the whole sequence in and have our smoothies in time for me to shower before work.
If she gets here in five minutes from now, we'll be able to get most of the sequence in and smoothies.
I went ahead and did the wrist and arm strength portions of the sequence. And then I did the core portion. And my friend showed up!
And, honestly, all shoulds disappeared.
We would get done what we got done before her boyfriend got back from his run. We warmed up, we did a few lunge variations, and it started to rain.
We laughed and continued through a sun salutation.
And then it started to rain.
So we gathered our stuff. We put it in the car, and we went across the street and had coffee banana smoothies. And I was absolutely fine. No beating myself up. No feeling like I had let myself or anyone else down. Just fine.
There is something to be said for failing on the first day. It removes my expectations and my fear of failure. It shows me how I can keep with the spirit of my intention with flexibility. It shows me that I can succeed without being rigid and that I can make room for me in my plans.
My sequence also got really wet and crinkly. And that will remind me to find grace as I continue through my month of this (mostly) pre-set sequence.
The best I can do is enough. No, scratch that. The best I can do is more than enough. The best I can do is plenty.
I wish you grace in your day, in your week, in your October.
Today's Mantra: I am entirely up to me.