Ack, guys. Just ack. This blogging thing? I do it on the weekends. I keep track of things I want to write about throughout the week. I’ll generate a random list of things I am thinking about. I’ll outline posts in my notebook. Sometimes I just speak them into my phone (Siri has a rough time with my accent). I keep a folder of pictures I take during the week that I think I might want to use on the blog. But the actual writing? I sit down and write a week’s worth all at once. I’ll spend a few hours and just knock them out on a Sunday afternoon. As I go through the week, I’ll proofread the post the night before it goes live, but that’s it. This space is pretty self-sustaining when I do the weekend work. (Other than food journal or video posts – those are very on-the-fly.)
So what happens when I have two HUGE weekends and then I get a stomach bug on the third one?
And that’s what has gone on. I’m not dead. I’m not struggling (unless you count the stomach bug). I’m just still figuring out fit.
The last few weeks? There just hasn’t been fit. Part of me feels super duper guilty. Not because I think you all have this grand expectation and anticipation for my posts, but because this is a space that I hope to use to show that I am a person that potential coachees would want as a coach. And if I’m not writing, then how are potential clients seeing me? Do I appear flighty and undependable? My worries and disappointment is from a professional angle. I just want to be better. I just want to build and grow. And I have (completely self-imposed) guilt and unease when I am treading water.
But it is what it is.
As I’m staring at another epic and full weekend starting tomorrow, I wonder what I will be able to make with this space in the next week. And I wonder where I will continue to find fit as I start training again.
I have a lot of puzzle pieces in front of me today. I’m working to figure out what will fit, what I don’t need to make fit, and how I make it fit in a way that feels life-affirming, manageable, and maintainable.
Rest assured that the blog is not going away. But know that I am actively trying to figure things out.
So, there’s that. All I have for you today is honesty.
And a tease that next week, I’ll show you pictures from Big Ginger’s Birthday Bash this weekend!