I have been defiant. Maybe overwhelmed. I’m not sure the right word, but I know it isn’t productive. At all. I haven’t been following any sort of eating plan. My house is a wreck. I didn’t even grocery shop this week, I just sent Nathan to the store for milk, bread, and apples.
Last week was incredibly stressful for me. And I just absorbed it all. I didn’t let it bounce off. I took it all in. And I’m not going to do that again.
I finished Firestarter Sessions today (sad trombone), and in my final reading, she talked a lot about balance. About how balance is a myth. About how I have to be comfortable letting my life ebb and flow, how I need to let my passion guide my focus and then just do the best I can do in the other areas of my life.
That really spoke to me. But just because something isn’t my focus doesn’t mean I am allowed to just give up entirely. I just have to figure out the system that helps the rest of my life fall in line. I still need to do the best I can. I can't do nothing because I can't do it perfectly.
In my heart, I know the answer. I need to make a plan and follow it. I’m working on a menu for next week. We’re having family in town next weekend, so I know the house will get clean before then, and then we’ll follow a schedule for maintenance. If I just spend an hour making a plan, I follow it. Because it is there. Because I don’t have to think about it. Making the time to do it is worth it.
I’m going to expect less balance for my life. Give myself a little leeway. But I’m going to set myself up for as much success as possible. I’m going to get back to planning.
Balance is a myth, my friends. But I can do much better than I did this week.
And I will.